15th December

Busy day, everyone got up but Frank & Joy both complained of feeling unwell. Frank decided he’d stay off work as he wasn’t safe to drive feeling sick & dizzy. I dropped Joy off at school and made my way to work. I saw an email arrive.

H: A hotel for an afternoon would be ideal but probably unrealistic, how’s you today? Has the ink healed or are you still bra less xxxxx

A: That would be amazing but would leave an audit trail with no work event to tie it to!!! If you can pull it off I’ll be available Monday or Tuesday but no risks is rule number 1 so it’s up to you if you can swing it.
Ink appears to have poisoned me, massive headache & back ache and I realised last night it’s probably the chemicals from the ink, my body can’t process them so I’m a bit stupid really 😏
Still bra less – I’m wearing a strappy top under my blouse for support but easy enough for you to access my breasts if you were here!!!
What you up to today? Xxxxxx

H: Morning gorgeous, let me work on it. Currently cleaning and disinfecting everything as my mum has the sickness bug and she was round at ours prior to getting ill.
I’ll try and call later xxxxx

I got a call from school to say that Joy was unwell so they were sending her home. Grandma picked her up so I asked if she needed me to come home and she said she’d be fine. I stayed at work and got on with my jobs.

A: That’s my job when I get home. Joy has thrown up at school and been sent home & Frank’s ill too 😔
Enjoy the cleaning, catch up later but no worries if not possible xxxxxxx

Short time before I left work for the day Harvey called me. We caught up on our day etc and he thinks he can get away Tuesday so we will see. I did look online for hotels and they seemed reasonable enough but it’s hard to do without an audit trail. Especially since all hotels now must have ID with cash transactions. I can get away from work easy enough so fingers crossed.

Got home and saw to the kids, Dick came home in a foul mood so I didn’t have the best night. He snapped at me so I went upstairs out of the way. I’m in no mood for that shit tonight. It’s his work do on Saturday where I get to play corporate wife, at this rate he’ll be going alone. I’ve bought a fab dress (it looks ok, but my original amazing dress is too tight and will show off my scabby un-healed tattoo!) great shoes & accessories. He’s still not shaved and looks like a hobo. He’s also planning to go wearing his jeans for fucks sake. I’ve told him he’s off to a works function not a fucking barbecue!!! He makes me so angry. I stayed out the way most of the night.

I showered, as I can’t bathe until my tattoo heals. Decided I’d take some photos on my phone to send to Harvey, maybe give him a thrill in the morning when he saw them, but no matter what angle I took them from I looked huge & quite unsightly. Had a bit of a “what the fuck am I thinking” moment. How on earth can I meet him looking so awful? My self esteem & confidence are on the floor at the moment so I’m torn between seeing him and having that reflected back at me or just not going. I want to see him, selfishly I’ve missed him terribly, not to mention the attention, the being wanted & desired but what if I get there and he’s disappointed? I haven’t seen him for 2 months, I’m the biggest I’ve ever been and the illness is really starting to show on my face now. I’m really torn. I know he wants to see me, for his selfish reasons too, I’m just not sure he could his hide disappointment. I also know I can’t bail on him either, he needs this release/relief as much (if not more!) than I do. There’s also the possibility it won’t come off and then I’m worrying for nothing. I need to unplug my head I think. I’m so twisted up & stressed I can’t think straight!

I came to bed really early as I was so pissed off and fed up with myself. Frank came to chat to me before he went to bed himself, he said he’s worried about me, he thinks I’ve gone to bed because I’m ill so I told a half truth, told him the tattoo ink was the cause of my headache & kidney pain but that I was ok, I’m just tired. Told him that I didn’t think about it at the time but in retrospect I probably should’ve realised but it’s done now and I’ll be fine. Which is true, plus I can’t very well tell him I’ve come to bed because I’ll kill his dad if he dares speak to me can I? He gave me a hug, without me asking or expecting one. Let’s hope he’s not passed his germs on 😑 He’s a good kid, I think I fooled him. His sister on the other hand is a clever cookie, she knows the situation well. She’s feeling a bit brighter tonight and insists she’s off to school tomorrow even though she should stay at home. We will see how she is overnight & in the morning before I make that decision. Off to bed before my head explodes with it all. Pray for a good nights sleep for everyone!


One thought on “15th December

  1. Places to sneak away to with out an audit trail are tricky these days!! A new friend told me about one, which I have yet to check out, but apparently it took a lot of hunting to find…..cash, few hours, any name and no ID – it sounds too good to be true but apparently it’s real!

    Hope you feel better tomorrow. Sending lots of restful vibes to you and yours xx

    Liked by 1 person

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