12th October

Couldn’t settle so once I posted yesterday’s blog I stayed downstairs and kept trying online check in it finally opened at 1am. But when I went to select our seats I got an error message telling me that I couldn’t check in and would have to be checked in at the airport. Did not improve my mood at all! Went to bed and Dick was asleep thank god. I removed his ipad and glasses off the bed and tried to settle down. Wasn’t really successful, I spent the night in various positions trying to get comfortable and will myself to sleep. It doesn’t help when you go to bed wound up to start with.

I gave up trying at 5.30 and got up washed & dressed. I managed to do that without disturbing Dick as I was in no mood for him and his attitude at all. Got Joy up and she woke in a good mood an was co-operative again. 2 days on the trot this could be a record, long may it last. Dick obviously heard Joy singing her head off in the bedroom so at least I didn’t wake him up. I was determined that I wouldn’t speak to him after the way he spoke to me last night. He got up showered and came down to breakfast, he kissed my head and apologized for being grumpy last night. I told him he wasn’t grumpy, he was rude and nasty and that I accepted his apology but I didn’t want to speak to him.

I went to work and had an ok day. I’ve been given the task of sorting Harvey’s away day out for his team in his absence, we have a new manager and he’s going to take his team too, that way if Harvey’s back fine, if not he’ll host both teams. I’m to send Harvey an invite as there’s a perception that if he’s not back it’ll do him good to see his team & have a break. We will see, I’ll offer the invitation and keep it tentative until we know what the situation will be nearer the time.

Came home & prepared the veg for tea as I’d already prepared a casserole last night which had been in the slow cooker all day. Very quick turn around as I had to race round as it’s Joy’s school open evening for post 16 choices. She’s decided on engineering or possibly architecture so she’s looking at maths, physics & art at A level. She’s on target for A’s & A stars so hopefully she can achieve what she needs to. She very intelligent and I’m really proud of her, all her teachers were very positive about her chances and have predicted great things so it was so nice to experience that. Especially as she’s a grade A pain in the arse at home.

From the school we walked to the gym for our dance fit class. I’d taken our kit with me in my bag, as we arrived the instructor didn’t recognise me as she’s only ever seen me in my gym kit! She paid me a lovely compliment about how she can tell how much more movement I have since I started and how much weight I’ve lost. It’s nice that people can see it as I can’t. I can tell in my jeans but that’s all. No doubt it’ll all go to shit next week while I’m away.

Worked out hard and those dumbbell routines are going to kill me, I pulled my back on the stretch cool down so I’m going to struggle tomorrow. Came home from there at 9.20pm, after leaving my house at 8am this morning I hadn’t sat down! Straight in the bath as I was really tired. Came down & Dick asked me how Joy’s school meeting went. Resisted the urge to point out he’d already know if he actually paid any attention and made the effort occasion. Told him what had been said and he agreed that getting her through the next two years before university was imperative. Let’s hope he stays supportive. Everyone went to bed so I was alone waiting for the washer to finish. My life is so rock n roll! I don’t like going to bed with the appliances on as I have an irrational fear they will burst into flames! (I know I did tell you I had more issues than vogue!). I received an email from Harvey. I think the situation is starting to get to him, he’s so exhausted & drained he needs a break. We had a short conversation and I hope he’s ok, I care about him enormously, far more than I ought to and definitely more than his wife would thank me for. Before all of this we were good friends and even if we hadn’t developed the relationship we have now, I’d still care as much and be as worried. I hope tomorrow is a better day for him.



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