20th September

Woke up several times during the the night but dozed off & on. The stress about today’s dentist appointment mainly that and the fact that Dick kept waking up with cramp after his mammoth exercise session. I did think he was going to attempt actual physical contact at one point but he turned over. I was grateful actually as I don’t know how I feel about him right now. Yes he has some work to do but I don’t want to help him, and if I sleep with him it’ll just go back to square one and he will just think everything’s ok. I rarely refuse him (lets face it, I get so little of anything from him that I have to accept as who knows when I’ll get the chance again???) but I think the fact I have Harvey very willing to take care of those needs helps enormously. Not long now until our overnight, very excited for that!

I got up at 5.30 as there was no way I was going to get any more sleep.

I logged on my emails and saw a notification that Harvey had commented on my post from last night.

H: It’s not fizzling xxxxxx I’m just busy playing catch up at work from holiday, that combined with my rubbish communication skills…..
Thinking of you as I go to bed with my hard cock in my hand

A: Best news I’ve had this week. Glad it’s all good. I’m here to help so shout up if you need anything. I hope you enjoyed stroking one out thinking of me xxxxxx

He’d also sent me an email.

H: Can’t wait to get my lips around your nipples so I can suck and nibble you xxxxxxxx I want to play with your tits right now stroking massaging and tweaking your head pulled back and you neck exposed for me to kiss……. Night babe xxxxx

A: Someone had a very late night! I hope your wife is ok. Thanks for the email and the comment on the post. I get so busy emptying my head of my thoughts I forget that you read it. I don’t know what to do about that. I don’t want to dilute the post by moderating my thinking and I don’t want to restrict your access either. Hard! Much like you last night I guess. I can’t wait until we’re alone on this overnight, I think we’re both overdue a distraction from all the shit we both have going on!
I want you so much, everywhere. Your fingers, lips, tongue & hard cock bringing me to orgasm. Myself getting you off, hot & heavy. Every part of me available for you to do as you want xxxxxxxx

H: Morning Hun
Good luck today, everything will be fine, looking forward to a chat at some point when you are able xxxxx

A: Thanks babe appreciate the kind thoughts. I’m shitting myself I’m not going to lie. Will let you know when I’m ok. I’ll be alone all day once I’m back so I’ll let you know when I can talk. I know you’re mega busy so don’t worry if you can’t call. Honestly it’s not an issue as long as you’re ok xxxx

H: I’m fine, you will be ok, it will be over quicker than one of your exquisite blow jobs xxxxx

Dick took me to the dentist which I was really grateful for. I don’t cope well in this situation due to an horrendous experience a few years ago. My previous dentist almost broke my jaw and made a real mess last time I had to have a tooth removed so it’s my worst nightmare. Luckily this dentist is amazing, its true what they say you get what you pay for!! I was glad someone was there as I was a wreck the whole way there and afterwards I couldn’t stop shaking. It took 40 minutes to remove one tooth from the very back of my mouth, all three roots were well embedded so it literally got taken out a bit at a time, not pleasant at all. I felt light headed so I had to stay in the surgery until my BP returned to what is considered normal for me. I cried like a five year old. So pathetic, I really don’t like being in that situation and I dread to think how bad I’d feel if I didn’t have the tranquilisers. Dick calmed me down and just held me until I stopped shaking. It times like these I know he cares, it’s just a shame he can’t be more consistent. When I went to see my kidney consultant last week he couldn’t be arsed and that was equally stressful, if not more important. Luckily it wasn’t bad news and in retrospect I’m glad I went on my own.

Worked from home when I got back as I knew I’d be shaken, plus my face is all swollen so my manager had agreed I could work from home. I let Harvey know I was ok via email.

A: That made me laugh thank you for that. All done, didn’t go as bad as I thought but still took 40 minutes to remove one tooth ffs. I’m going to be sore when the anaesthetic wears off that’s for sure.
How’s the wife? Xxxx

As I knew I’d be at home I arranged for my boiler service in the afternoon so I could kill two birds with one stone. As luck would have it, Joy was taken unwell at school so I was grateful I was here to keep an eye on her. Literally 5 minutes before she was due to be dropped off Harvey called. We had a chat about this blog, he still wants access to it and doesn’t want me to feel like I have to be restrained in what I say on here. I’ve asked him in that case not to comment on it. I don’t mind him knowing the inner musings of my mind (which I really should do, but strangely I have no issue with it!) as in one way it gives him an honest view of what I think about it all. Fore warned is forearmed. And I’m another it’s a great way to have a one conversation ☺️ I asked about his wife and it does appear that she really is ill as she’s been admitted. How awful for them, for her obviously it means being in hospital ill and not knowing what is wrong and for him it means his overseas trip is cancelled. There’s always something going on, life is never plain sailing for either of us. Its good we have a distraction to keep us going.

Joy came home and after having a snack and some painkillers she went to bed.

Dick called a few times to see how I was, that’s a new one. He’d usually just not bother, he’s obviously making an effort, I can’t get excited about that though as it will be short lived I’m sure of it.

Before I left for the dentist this morning I prepared tonights tea of pork steak & sausage casserole. Simple enough with mash, carrots, sprouts, broccoli & red cabbage. No Yorkshire puddings though as we’re on it. I’m not sure my kids will ever forgive me but they need to get over it, I feel so shocking they should be grateful I’ve not made them cook their own!!

We had a pleasant evening, think everyone enjoyed it. All five of us (including Frank’s girlfriend) had tea together and just chilled. Dick asked Frank to help him unload the car as he’d bought a set of dumbbells! There’s no where to put them yet as we need to sort out the space in the bedroom but god forbid that stops the world of commerce for fucks sake. They’re now in the living room waiting for someone to trip over them in the dark. I mean where else would you put black weights but on a black carpet!! It’s an accident waiting to happen. It’s only overnight apparently (yeah I’ve fallen for that one before!). I went in the bath but couldn’t settle, when I lie down my face throbs from where I had the tooth removed so god knows how I’m going to get any sleep!! I plan to take painkillers & my last sleeping tablet before bed. I sent Harvey an email to let him know he was in my thoughts.

A: Hope everything is going as well as it can with her being in hospital. I’m completely knackered so an early night for me I think. See you tomorrow if you’re in babe xxxxx
Thinking of you xxxxx

Enjoyed the peace, Dick’s on early so he went to bed about an hour ago, Joy is still not well so she’s stayed in bed, Frank’s gone to the gym and I’ve done my nails whilst listening to music. Ariana Grande into you is the current ear worm I can’t shake, very catchy & very relevant. Need to chill out before I take my medication so I’ve switched to Ludovico Einaudi. Le onde is my all time favourite piece of his.

Click here to hear  a clip from YouTube – calming & great for helping me breathe & relax.

I’m going to finish listening to this then I’m off to bed!

Goodnight from Ava x



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