No contact – Contact!

So Harvey commented on my last post asking me if I’d been in and read the drafts file lately. He has pointed out that technically this wasn’t contact. I replied to say that I’d look later, which I did.

I logged on and he had posted another apology and said some things he wanted to say. He still doesn’t know why he sent it but accepts it was a foolish move. He said he wants to continue & reiterated that it’s in my hands but doesn’t want me to say stop. He’s expected a Dear John so I think he was worried that I would end it. I replied via email though I can’t be arsed though with keep logging on & going in to drafts to see if it’s been updated. I know, I’m a nightmare.

A: I’m glad you reached out the way you did. It made me smile to see you’d commented as Harvey, that’s the first time I’ve smiled in days. I only noticed that though after I shit myself when I realised I’d forgot to go in and delete the link!! It must be strange to read the inner workings of my jumbled mind. I still don’t know what to think and I’m really hoping I feel better when I see you. I won’t send you a dear john, that would be complete cowardice on my part and although I’m a lot of things, coward isn’t one of them. I want to get past this and get back to where we were before Saturday. Right now I need a hug and a conversation, I’m looking forward to both when I see you. Whatever happens after that – well only we will know then. Know that I care about you very much, if I didn’t this would be a piece of piss to walk away from and I’m still here. Please have a great time with your family and enjoy your holiday. I fully appreciate the fact you reached out and how you did it. It’s going to be entertaining trying to find a gif or meme to go with that post!!

I’m off to bed – it’s been a hell of a day! Hoping for sleep and a peaceful night.


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